nothing pisses me off more than the fact that 90% of women’s jeans have non-functioning pockets but baby clothes have proper pockets? what are babies carrying around that i’m not? baby wallets? fuck off
when you are in a hurry and someone wont let the conversation end
if mermaids exist i hope they stay hidden because we’re just gonna end up killing them like we do everything else
Today this girl in class looked different because she had straightened her hair and I told her it was so pretty and straight and she goes “unlike me”. So me thinking that she has bad self esteem, I say “don’t say that. You’re pretty.” To which she replies “oh no, im pretty. I’m just not straight.” And I shit you not my stomach still hurts from laughing too hard.